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In my last blog post, I wrote about how we lost Joey, our cat of 16 years. And how I had my eye on a new cat, Buddy. The writeup said he was ready to save a new human with his unconditional love.”

I did end up learning lessons from Buddy the cat. Not about love, but about the Heart, grief, and the power of the Halo.

It all started when the foster mom for Buddy called on Monday to offer to bring the cat to my house. I thought, “Why not?” But I didn’t really pray about it or check in with my Heart.

Well, the foster mom for Buddy called on Monday to offer to bring the cat to my house. I thought, “Why not?” But I didn’t really pray about it or check in with my Heart.

On Tuesday foster mom Rita brought Buddy by. He was very shy, but we finally coaxed him out of his hiding place. He rubbed up against our legs and allowed us to pet him.

Nice cat, I was thinking. Then, my husband touched him in the wrong way, apparently, because Buddy bit Gene. Hard. On the finger. It bled for quite a while.

Gene washed his finger well, put some First Aid ointment on, and didn’t think much more about it. It didn’t really hurt, he said.

Hours later, I told my friend about the incident. She said, “Cat bites are very dangerous. Gene needs medical attention.” She sent some Internet links that confirmed her point. Apparently a cat bite injects a lot of bacteria into the bloodstream that’s pretty pathogenic. (Who knew?)

We took off the bandage and looked at the wound. Indeed, it had begun to get red and swollen. I suggested using the Halo light on the wound. Then we called the doctor.

Since it was after hours, a triage nurse got back to us. “We need to treat cat bites within 4 hours, or serious infection can set in. And it can happen very quickly. See if you can get to Urgent Care. They close in 10 minutes.”

We literally stopped eating and jumped into the car. Didn’t make it to Urgent Care in time. Called the triage nurse back on the way home to report the situation. “How does the wound look?” she asked.

We pulled the car over and looked at Gene’s wound. To our amazement, it was no longer red or swollen! Had to have been the Halo. The nurse said she’d have a prescription for an antibiotic called in to the pharmacy, and made an appointment for Gene to see the doctor next day. He also had to get a tetanus shot.

(Side note: We were astonished to discover that tetanus and other shots such as pneumonia are not administered in either the doctor’s office or a hospital lab—only at a pharmacy now.  At least that’s true in our area. Who knew?)

Gene continued to use the Halo (both shining the light on the wound and also drinking the treated water, which we always do anyway), and is taking the antibiotics. The wound is fine, as you can see from the picture.

As far as Buddy goes, he tried to bite me twice as well. I don’t think he is a bad cat, just traumatized or perhaps sore from getting his chip, or hurting from some unknown condition. (I did two Healing Codes for him while he was here.) He could have worked out, I think.

However, I realized that I hadn’t given myself enough time to grieve over Joey. Buddy wasn’t Joey; I still wanted Joey. I wasn’t ready for another cat, and Buddy went back to Rita. I think my Heart will tell me when I am ready.

So another lesson learned: Grieving can’t be hurried. Not even with The Healing Codes. And just because I’ve always had at least one cat, doesn’t mean this is right for me now. I must stay current with my Heart and life circumstances. Right now I don’t need any complications. This new cat disrupted two days of our lives (not to mention the unexpected medical bills). I get the message.

Another thought came to mind, a reminder from an earlier lesson I wrote about. Just because things aren’t the same, doesn’t mean they still can’t be good.” Not having a cat feels strange and uncomfortable, but that doesn’t mean this catless time can’t be good in its own way. I am quite sure that when I’m ready for another cat, one will somehow come into my life.

And this time I’ll tune in to my Heart and know it’s right.

If you would like personalized help to tune in to your Heart more, letting it guide your healing and your life, check out


This week we had to face that fact that our beloved big black cat, Joey, the last of our pets, was too sick to treat, and had to put him down.

This is the first time in 20 years I have been petless, and I can hardly stand it. So I’ve been looking at descriptions of adoptable cats in local animal shelters.

This description struck of one particular cat struck me, and I’ll tell you why after you read it:

“Buddy is a 4 year old Superhero that possess abilities beyond those of ordinary cats. He can use his purr-powers to help your home become a better place. He wears his black & white logo with pride. He has other powers too, which include winning every race to the food bowl, out weighing most of his lap-cat competitors at 17.5 lbs, and able to make you love him in a single leap of faith! Buddy recently experienced a major life change when his beloved human was transferred to a senior home. Because he was so loved and cared for, he has bounced back like Superheroes do, and is ready to save a new human with his unconditional love.”

That last line struck me: “Because he was so loved and cared for, he has bounced back. . . .”

That is what love does, for humans and animals: it makes us resilient, even in the face of loss. I feel drawn to Buddy; maybe he’ll be our next cat? Already he’s given me a lesson in resilience.

Coaching question: How can you draw on the love you have received in your most important positive relationships to help you “bounce back,” especially during these exceptional times? How can you offer love to another to help them become more resilient?

If you would like help healing your heart issues and opening up to love and be loved, check out my coaching at

In my last blog post, I talked about a question that can shift everything. I shared about the “tsunami” that hit our family over the last 5 years, and how asking, “Are these things happening TO me or FOR me?” helped me shift my focus and get through it all with lessons learned and even gifts received.

It occurred to me afterward that I could adapt that question into a Truth Focus Statement to use with my Healing Code work, and I did that as I worked on my current issues. (Always seems to be some issue to work on! This healing journey is never over in this life.)

So the “Truth that Shifts” I used was: “God allows difficult things to come into my life for my ultimate good. He is constantly willing and able to work all things together for good as I entrust each difficulty to him. I will look for the gift and the lesson, and respond in gratitude.”

This Truth Focus Statement is something I do believe totally, so it will work to infuse a greater truth than what I might feel (that life is happening TO me and I have no control).

According to High Sensitivity expert Julie Bjelland, any positive input takes at least 20 seconds to register in our brain as a positive, and it takes 8-10 positives to counteract one negative. (The negative goes into the brain automatically.)  This is probably why Truth Focus Statements are so powerful when done with holding a Healing Code position for 30 seconds. Your Truth that Shifts will be negating the lie you’ve believed, actually changing your brain and the frequency of that “cellular belief.”

One of the things we constantly need to look for and heal on our healing journey is the lies we believe. We get to the lies through the feelings. When I felt helpless and overwhelmed, I was believing that life was happening TO me. The Truth that Shifts was to believe that God allowed these things to come into my life because he has a purpose for them. Looking for the lessons learned, gifts received, and valued character traits developed from the challenges of my life made me realize that, indeed, almost if not every challenge did yield a gift.

The trick is to look for it.

We discussed this in my Healing Hearts Circle group coaching this week. One person shared how growing up with alcoholism, while tremendously difficult, developed in her a great ability to see through things, to “read the energy” of people and situations. To me, this is an example of how our experiences can magnify a trait we already have: this person was born a Highly Sensitive empath.

Another member shared how he conquered his fear of heights, then transferred this to a belief that he could conquer his current fear. His Truth that Shifts: “Because I already overcame one fear, I know I can conquer this one, too.”

So I leave you with two things that will enhance your Healing Code work.

One: Identify the lie behind your issue (there almost always is one), and explore what might be the Truth That Shifts. Look for the gift/lesson/character trait that came as a result of whatever challenge you faced in your memory or from something like what you’re facing now, as my client who used overcoming his fear of heights to give him confidence to overcome his current fear.

Two: Fashion a Truth Focus Statement around that exploration, and use that when doing your Healing Code.

Let me know how this works for you!

And if you want personalized help in finding the lies, and/or fashioning your Truth that Shifts Truth Focus Statement, check out my coaching. I also have a free download for Truth Focus Statements you can use any time. Go to and click on the Free Tools link.

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The Big Shift that Heals

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“Is life happening TO you or FOR you?”

When this question was posed to me, it stopped me dead in my tracks.

I had been trying to process the events of the past five years. They were a rough five years, and the recent “emotional inflammation” of world events and some new personal challenges had triggered still unprocessed issues.  It felt important to revisit the traumas of the past several years from the perspective of this question.

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It all started in 2015, with a dental crisis. Then my husband was forcibly retired, and the family lost our medical insurance, not to mention his income. We had to fight his employer to get unemployment insurance.

My son was also laid off at the same time. My husband’s sister, Connie, got cancer and was put on hospice. My husband became her Power of Attorney, and we discovered Connie’s caregiver had been stealing money from her. What was especially painful is the caregiver saw to it that the money Connie was going to send my daughter for her college education was taken, and it was uncertain how my daughter was going to finish college.

My website was hacked and my friend who was helping me abandoned me. Dealing with that whole situation led to a legal issue with a particularly slimy company that lasted for months.

Then Connie died, and her former caregiver caused us more legal issues. We had to settle that estate and sell a house out of state. In the midst of dealing with all that, when we were out of town, our basement flooded. A good friend whom I relied on for support told me that very day that God was punishing me. (Sudden end to friendship.)

We learned months later a mold issue developed after the flood. My beloved cat died of cancer, probably as a result of being in that moldy basement a lot. Our finished basement was gutted, and we lost all the contents (mostly books and our Christmas decorations).

My mother had two strokes, and I lost the close relationship we had finally forged over the prior few years once she couldn’t really communicate after the strokes. On top of that, I was made her Power of Attorney, which caused all kinds of family issues. I realized, after a visit out there in 2017, that there was absolutely no support from those quarters, and there never was. (Reading Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect by Dr. Jonice Webb has helped me understand the dynamics of that situation.)

The worst of  it all was the weekend in May 2018 when two horrendous things happened: I almost lost my entire database (which is any business’s greatest asset), AND my dear friend and neighbor of 20+ years, who was like a big sister to me, was brutally murdered, along with her husband, in her own home. Nancy was like a grandmother to our son; she raised her grandson, who was my son’s best friend, as I raised my son.

This isn’t even all of it, just the lowest of the lowlights. Enough to give you a picture of what we think of as “the tsunami” of unfortunate events. Just as we were beginning to feel like we were “getting back to normal”–the pandemic hit.

I don’t think I would have gotten through all that if it weren’t for The Healing Codes and healing prayer, in particular Immanuel Prayer, and the support of other people. Honestly, I’m still working on some of it, especially the grief of all the losses, Nancy in particular.

Back to the question, “Is life happening TO you or FOR you?”

If life is happening TO me, I will feel like a victim. I will seek to escape things, or try to control what happens. I will live in fear of what may happen. I will remain tethered to the painful things that have already happened, and seek (subconsciously) to avoid anything like it happening again.

But what if I allowed myself to believe that life is happening FOR me? That God has the ability and the will to turn any painful experience into at least a lesson, perhaps even a gift? (Isn’t that what Romans 8:28 states?)

I do not believe, by the way, that somehow my soul “chooses” and attracts terrible things so that I can evolve into a higher state. I remember someone responding to that philosophy very vehemently. She had been raised in an extremely abusive home. “There is no way I will ever believe that I would have chosen those parents and that family! What a cruel philosophy!” I could really see her point.

I believe there is a force in this world that is against all goodness. Call it entropy, sin, or Satan–there is something that works against goodness in the world.

But there is something else stronger–God–who has committed himself to turning all things for good, who has in fact triumphed over evil in Jesus Christ. So those who align themselves with this God put themselves in the path of that principle working for them. Those who resist this grace fall prey to the forces that pull us down.

If I believe that indeed, God is working all things for my good, then I can be grateful for the lessons I learned. I can feel confident that because of those lessons, I can perhaps avoid similar incidents. Or at least know I’ll be OK if things like it happen again.

I can look for the gifts that can come from the painful and traumatic experiences.

Some of the gifts I see from my “tsunami”: I know now how to settle an estate (which I will need, as I’m my mom’s executor). From the betrayals of others, I learned to assess a person’s capacity for intimacy and trust. Having been duped by Connie’s caregiver and some other con artists I won’t mention, I’m less naive and more discerning. I found better tools for running my business.

God even brought something beautiful out of Nancy’s terrible death: an Immanuel Prayer experience that I lean on every day, especially as evil seems to rear its ugly head with every newscast.

There’s also some gentle irony in some of the lessons. For instance, for years I berated myself for not “decluttering” my office by putting more books in the basement. Yet, had I done so, I would have lost those books as well. I believe that God knew just which of my precious books I actually needed to retain. Here I was, unnecessarily beating myself up for my “procrastination,” while all the time God was preserving something he knew I would need. Perhaps God has a purpose behind even my “weaknesses.”

Yet another gift: In the process of my own healing journey, I’ve developed some new healing approaches that are helping me, and will help others, to face the “tsunamis” of life. (Which of course, with the pandemic and all the fallout of that, everyone is dealing with.)

What about you? Is life happening TO you, or FOR you? How might your life’s narrative shift if you adopted the view that life is happening FOR you, and you began to see the gifts?

If you’d like some personalized help to shift from “life is happening TO me,” to “life is happening FOR me” by healing your heart issues, consider getting some coaching. The Healing Codes, and the tools of my own that I’ve developed, can help you align with your divine design and find the love, joy, peace, purpose and fulfillment you know you were meant to experience.

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Healing Over Time

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“When you go through deep waters and great trouble, I will be with  you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown!”–Isaiah 43:2

My friend Virginia told me the greatest gift she’s received from God is the gift of healing. “Many times I have been hurt so deeply I think I can never get over this,” she said. She mentioned embarrassments,  humiliations, loneliness, depression, and discouragement. Yet despite such feelings, Virginia  says, “over time, the trauma of the experience dims. I look back on  the experience without the feelings I had in the midst of it. I have the lessons I learned from it. I’m amazed at how resilient I am.”

I could easily remember such experiences in my own life.

I like something I heard from Dr. Mark Virkler: “You know when something is healed when you can see the gift in it.” That feels right. Once we truly receive the lessons, the gifts from the experience, we are healed.

There is a progression to pain. First the blow. Then the shock. Then the tidal wave of pain. Here is the critical point. Will we wade through pain all the way to the other side–trusting there is another side? Or will we fight the tide, trying to turn around and escape it? (Futile  thought!) Will we pretend we’re sailing through when we’re actually drowning? Even if we refuse to wade right in, the pain will lap at our feet. It will pose a threat, keeping us trapped on the shore.

If we don’t resist the pain, the current will take us to the other side. Healing is built into creation. The Healing Codes and prayer can greatly speed the healing, which is always a process.

As the moon governs the tide, so grace governs the deep waters that engulf you. Grace will get you to the other side. From that distant shore, a much stronger swimmer, you will look out over the waters and say in wonder, “I came  through. I can see the gifts. The current of grace did not fail.”

And it never will!

Related article: “Do I Need To Keep Doing Healing Codes Once My Issue Heals?”

If you would like some personalized help to speed the healing of your heart issues, check out my coaching at

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Healing from “Not Enough”

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When I wrote last December about “settling into the energy of enough,” I had no idea it would be such a journey.

I thought it would be a simple process of figuring out what “enough” was, via reading a bit about Minimalism, clear some space physically, mentally, and emotionally. I thought it would be mostly about gratitude. I did not think it would not be a big deal.

After all, haven’t I been doing healing work every single day since 2007?

Well, it’s turned into quite an undertaking. Turns out, “settling into the energy of Enough” is a lot more involved than I thought.

First of all, there’s the becoming aware of how pervasive and deep “not enough” is for me. Who knew?

I began to realize that it goes all the way back to childhood (as most things seem to do—sigh). Because I grew up with Childhood Emotional Neglect and was so different from my family (highly sensitive),  “not good enough” became a big part of me. Though I excelled at school, the family was indifferent to it. My father often said, “I wish my boys had your brains.” I took that to mean they were wasted on a girl. All that mattered for girls, in the culture I grew up in, was that they be pretty and please others, especially men.

Also, there was “not enough” of other things in the family. Attention, love, interest, money. As an adult, trying to grasp this suddenly huge issue of “enough,” I realize I continued the process by denying myself so many things that are really “me,” in favor of doing “what’s expected” (which was a big value in my family).

Religion also plays a role in this “not enough.” Distorted or incomplete religious teachings can lead you to feel you’re not good enough for God unless you do X, Y, or Z.  Even if you do grasp the meaning of grace, which is what true spirituality is all about, there’s often the subtle pressure in churches to “serve.” This is fine, but when there’s the sense that you can never really serve enough, the needs are so great and you’re being selfish to think of your own needs when there are so many people worse off than you who need what you have—then, at least for me—it becomes very toxic.

It’s not just religious communities who can send that message, either. Work environments can also foster this “not enough” mindset. “You won’t be successful if you don’t push harder, put in more hours than other people.”

You’re not enough. You don’t do enough. You don’t know enough. There is not enough. These messages are everywhere, aren’t they? Advertising is based on it.

Just becoming aware of how “not enough” affects you is the first step. Bring this unhealthy belief and the memories behind it to your Healing Code work! Using the Truth Focus Statement, I am enough, I do enough, I know enough, I have enough, there is enough has been quite a help. As I have worked with this, oh the freedom I’m experiencing!

If “not enough” is an issue for you, I would love to come alongside you on your healing journey and help you find the freedom to be you as well. Check out my coaching at

Reframing Trauma

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I was talking with a client the other day and we were marveling at how far she has come in her healing work.

This client, whom I’ll call Debbie, has overcome severe childhood abuse, both physical and emotional, dealt to her practically since birth. What is so amazing is how well she can hear from God now, given that she actually had brain injury. And that hearing from God, plus her commitment to faithfully do The Healing Codes, is leading to much healing.

It occurred to me that it’s quite possible that her extraordinary spiritual attunement might have come, not despite the abuse, but because of the abuse. That God used the very changes in her brain caused by the abuse for his own good purposes. Sort of like how an ugly caterpillar gets transformed into a beautiful butterfly–after falling completely apart in the chrysalis first.

I can’t prove that’s true, but it’s in line with what I’ve experienced in my life and seen in the lives of others: God can take something harmful, and turn it around to accomplish something good. As I wrote about recently, God’s way is to find any small positive thing, and increase it until it overcomes the negative.

It’s also in line with many stories in Scripture. My favorite one is the story of Joseph from Genesis 37-48. At age 17, Joseph (whose name, by the way, means “increase”) was the youngest of 11 brothers–and also his father’s favorite. Out of jealousy, his brothers sold him into slavery and told their father that he was killed by wild animals.

Joseph went through all kinds of trials in Egypt, through no fault of his own. In fact, several times, things got worse for him because he did the right thing. But ultimately his fortune turned around and he ended up being second in command to Pharaoh in Egypt. When a famine drove the brothers to go to Egypt to buy grain, they met Joseph but did not recognize him. You can sense that Joseph wrestled with making his brothers pay for what they did to him, but in the end, he forgave him and reconciled with them.

Joseph’s turnaround came when he saw God’s big picture: that it was because they had sold him into slavery that the family survived the famine. “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives,” he told them.

In my own life, I have pondered how God has used some of my traumas to bring me to the point I am now. Read More→

I’m Listening . . .

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I think I’ve cried at least once every single day for the past several weeks, if not months.

As someone who can’t help but feel and think deeply about everything, I have taken my time to respond to what is happening in the world, but especially in our country, about racism in particular.

I am and have always been about “healing heart issues.” I have worked with clients in 39 countries, and of all races and religions. Because I usually only use phone or Skype voice, I do not see my clients, and this gives me and them the freedom to relate at the heart level.

I have found that no matter the color of one’s skin, the same heart beats in all of us.

Having said that, I know that we are all affected by our culture and the surrounding culture. We have the same heart issues, but we don’t have the same experience. In our culture, there is wide disparity between socioeconomic and racial cultures. We can easily find many areas of injustice that need correcting.

I recently wrote a blog about distorted thinking, with the challenge to filter everything you hear or read—even what comes out of your own mouth—through this lens. Our culture’s polarization, for instance, is a perfect example of most of the thinking styles mentioned. And racism is built on ALL of them.

We need to first confront the distorted thinking, the heart wounds, that exist in our own hearts before we can clearly engage in any conversation about healing on a larger scale. As Jesus said, we need to remove the log in our own eye before we can see to take out the speck in our brother’s eye.

With that said, I am prayerfully asking God to show me any way in which my own heart and my own thinking need to be changed.

And I am listening. Deeply. With humility. Listening to my black brothers and sisters, to my friends and colleagues, to people who demonstrate that they are thinking clearly.

And I want to listen to YOU. If there is anything you have seen in what I have said that shows any kind of distorted thinking like that on my blog, or just plain ignorance, call me out, please. I promise to listen.

I believe that love is what is needed now more than ever. And love listens. Love allows space for another to be heard, without judgment. That is what I have always sought to do with my clients, friends and family.

After talking with thousands of clients the world over, I believe one of the greatest aches of the human heart is to be validated. To be heard.

I want you who read this to know that I believe you should be heard. That your experience matters. That YOU matter. Growing up in a home in which I felt like I didn’t matter because I was different (with the trait of high sensitivity), I get that deep need. “Black lives matter” is a very moving statement to me.

I am also listening to God, searching his word for his perspective. What I find is that to God, ALL lives matter, simply because he created every person. God himself loves diversity. You see this in the very first book of the Bible, Genesis, when he made an incredible variety of things, and you see it in the very last book (Revelation), where the vision is of “peoples from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, with palm branches in their hands” (Revelation 7:9). From beginning to end in the Bible, God loves and values diversity.

And so should we, for that very reason.

God loves diversity!

Years ago in 2006, I wrote on my Abundant Gifts blog a post called “Room for All Kinds.” It moved me greatly to write it, and I offer it to you now:

This is the vision I hold to, and pray for. Before God we all stand equal . . . and beloved. When you know yourself—and every other person–as the Beloved of God, it changes everything.

My work is to help you see that you are the Beloved, and then I trust that God and your own aligned self will make clear the unique contribution you are to make to a world in which God’s celebration of diversity is meant to be made manifest.

I invite you to pray, along with me, the following prayers for the world that God has laid on my heart.

There is power in any one person’s prayer, but there is even more power in the combined intent of shared prayer. Our world is in a crisis, but God still is God. He still sits on the throne and has allowed all the things going on in this world for a reason. I believe that part of the reason might be to call people to reach beyond themselves and human institutions, to the only One who can get us through all this.

So please join me in praying these short prayers. My suggestion is that you choose a specific time each day to play my recording by clicking on this link, and pray along with me, out loud, as you read the prayer below.


Dear God, you who are Light in whom there is no darkness at all, you who created the universe and now sustain it with the power of your might, hear our prayer.

Most merciful God, we confess that we have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed, by what we have done, and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you with our whole heart; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves. We are truly sorry and we humbly ask for your forgiveness and your power to change our ways.

We pray that you would shine your light into every corner of the world, to expose evil, to highlight the good, to heal, and to point the way toward truth and love, and guide our feet in the paths of peace.

We pray that you would awaken in people everywhere a thirst for the truth, a love for the truth, and that they would seek it, and recognize it when they see it.

Heavenly Father, Lord of all, in your love and grace have mercy on us and heal us, and in your power thwart evil wherever it rears its head.

Finally, reveal to each person your divine design. May each of us know very specifically our particular part in carrying out these very requests, and give us the strength, the courage, and the love to do what you’re calling each of us to do.


I believe I am seeing answers to these prayers since I have started praying them weeks ago. I invite you to join me, and to share your answers.

The events rocking the world at this time, especially the U.S., are staggering.

I have felt deep pain in my heart space over all that is happening. So much pain, loss, heartbreak. Evil exposed (this is a good thing, but so difficult to witness). Injustice and violence.

The latter two especially make me feel physically ill. I learned recently that there’s a name for this stress that can affect us even physically, that feels almost like post-traumatic stress. It’s the pain that stems from taking in the energy of a tumultuous world (and, for people of color, the energy of passive and active discrimination and racism), and it now has a name: “emotional inflammation.” You can listen to a podcast about this here, or check out the book by Dr. Lise Van Susteren and Stacey Colino here. It helped me to understand how much we are all affected by what’s going on in the world.

(For the 20% with the trait of High Sensitivity, emotional inflammation is almost unavoidable; we take in so much more, and process it at such a deep level.)

The problem is, there are many narratives out there. So many nuances to an issue. So many people twisting the facts to fit their own narrative (or ignoring key facts). I feel mentally and emotionally exhausted just thinking about making my way through all of it to the truth.

But I am committed to doing so, through prayer, as God leads. I want to be part of the solution, not the problem.

One thing I notice, among the maelstrom of media, social and otherwise, is how rampant the dysfunctional thinking is behind so much of the narratives. When a friend sent me a link to a very helpful graphic on “unhelpful thinking styles,” I began to apply it not only to my life, but to what I was hearing and reading. Read More→

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