Archive for Diane Recommends

Oct
22

“That Doesn’t Work for Me . . .”

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Have you ever read (or heard) something that sounded like great wisdom, great advice . . .

and you try it and it doesn’t work for you?

Then you think, There must be something wrong with me.

I just read some advice about how to feel better when you’re feeling down. The writer called her sponsor and said she was upset about something. The sponsor told her, ‘Get over yourself and go find someone to help.”

The person took the advice, and felt better, she said.

Maybe this works for some people, like her. But for me, as a Highly Sensitive Person who also grew up with Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), it’s all wrong. (If you’re not sure if these apply to you, take the free assessments here.)

Read More→

Jun
30

Breathing Technique to Stop Anxiety

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Recently I watched a video presentation by Ari Whitten, on “Breathing for Energy” (replay here), which was, as is usual for him, excellent. (I have his Energy Blueprint program.)

Ari shared a number of breathing techniques, along with the surprising news that deep breathing is actually not good for you. Deep breathing does not oxygenate the blood, as is commonly believed. Ari explains the interaction between carbon dioxide and oxygen, and how oxygen actually gets delivered to your cells.

He also explains why we must breathe through the nose, rather than the mouth. Nasal breathing activates nitric oxide, which provides multiple health benefits, including killing virus particles that can lead to respiratory infections.

Most of us over-breathe. Optimal breathing is actually: Read More→

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Recently I got together with three other women who are all as passionate as I am about living an Aligned Life. We explored the deeper meaning of health, home, money & marketing.

We had a blast.

Our lively discussion focused on what Alignment with our deepest soul values looks like in various areas of our lives: health, home, marketing, and money. How can we break negative cycles and redefine each of these areas according to who we are, not how anyone else says we should be?

I talked about “Healing the Unexamined Life,” by which I mean a life ruled by unhealed heart issues rather than Alignment with our True Selves. If you’ve ever struggled with how to present energy healing to someone to help them understand what you do with The Healing Codes, this will give you ideas!

Vanessa Redford took the idea of Alignment into our homes to define “the alchemy of sacred spaces,” showing how we can set up our environments to reflect and support who we really are. It doesn’t require an outside designer or a lot of money, either!

Angela Matthews shed light on how we can heal financial trauma for a “ridiculous flow” of abundance. If you’ve ever thought, “I’m not an investor, I can’t do that”–Angela may well change your mind!

April Gregory talked about how “branding” is really a reflection of who you are. We are all our own “brand,” whether we work in our own business or for a company. Here’s how to shine in all your true brilliance to attract just whom you’re meant to serve.

Honestly, this discussion was a huge blessing for me. Not only did I discover a new way to share about The Healing Codes, but one of my goals (before I met Vanessa) was to transform my home. Another goal (before I met Angela) was to learn how to invest wisely my recent inheritance. And as I am being led in new directions in my work, new expression is required—i.e., branding (hello April!).

Not to mention I got to dip my toe further into video, and connect with some fabulous women. (It gets lonely being a soloprenueur, you know?) For me anyway, this Roundtable, which just sort of “happened” unexpectedly, was one of those “abundant gifts” I see coming from the gracious hand of God.

That’s what living Aligned is all about. When you’re Aligned with Your Divine DesignTM, you always get what you need, when you need it—often in surprising ways. How wonderful is that?

Watch our Aligned Mastermind Roundtable discussion of “Breaking Cycles and Redefining: Marketing & Money, Home & Health” here.

If after watching our discussion you have questions, here’s how to find each of us:

Diane Eble:

diane@healingheartissues.com

https://HealingHeartIssues.com, https://healingcodescoaching.com

Vanessa Redford:

vanessa@vanessaredford.com

https://www.vanessaredford.com

April Gregory:

www.wonderwomanmarketing.com 

april@wonderwomanmarketing.com 

Angela Matthews:

Angela@happyinvestormethod.com 

www.happyinvestormethod.com

 

 

I don’t know about you, but the events of the past several years have given me quite a case of “emotional inflammation.”

I’ve been writing about “emotional inflammation” and how these troubling times can literally affect us physically. The negative energy is all around us, and we can’t escape it.

In the past few years, it’s only gotten worse, it seems. I’m sure I don’t need to delineate the detailsof what I’m talking about.  Even if you limit your news intake, as I do, you still can’t avoid the negative energy all around.

For some of us, especially if we have the trait of High Sensitivity, the energy is palpable: we feel it in our bodies.

One client said recently she sensed a “dark energy cloud” around her. Yep, that’s a good way to describe Emotional Inflammation.

Authors Dr. Lise Van Susteren and Stacey Colino say in their book, Emotional Inflammation, that it’s a state “not unlike post-traumatic stress disorder, but one that stems from simply living in today’s tumultuous world.”

That book was published in March 2020–right before “all this” became worse. It’s even more relevant now. Read More→

Have you ever been under so much stress that you just couldn’t get your brain to focus on even the simplest task at hand?

I’m sure you have. Perhaps it’s even a daily occurrence, given the amount of stress many of us have endured for so long. It hasn’t really abated, has it?

Today, I needed to write my weekly article, and my brain just wasn’t working.

Normally I am full of ideas; knowing what to write about was never a problem. I texted my best friend, Louise: “Pray for me please. I can’t think of a thing to write about.”

Louise knew exactly why my brain wasn’t working. She is the only one, aside from my husband, who has been privy to all the twists and turns of this estate I need to settle as co-executor. Several lawyers have agreed our situation will go down in the annals of lawyer lore as The Most Complicated and Messy Situation EVER.

Twists and turns, delays and roadblocks, unpleasant shocks . . . Every. Step. Of. The. Way.

And now we were facing a deadline, and there was dead silence from all the people I needed to hear from.

Louise texted back, “How about writing about when you can’t think due to stress? Explore what it’s like and how it happens and why there are times when you need to give yourself an extra large dose of grace.”

So here goes. Here’s what it’s like, and what I did to get through it to a place of calm. Read More→

Now we’re a year into the COVID-19 pandemic, and the stress hasn’t really let up, has it?

I was blessed by a friend sending me a link to a Brene Brown podcast of an interview with the authors of Burnout: The Secret of Unlocking the Stress Cycle, Emily and Amelia Nagoski.

It was so helpful to me I want to pass it along. Here’s the link to the podcast.

You will learn how stress lives in your body, and that there is a stress cycle that, if you don’t pass all the way through, will get stuck and cause problems.

The good news, as the authors stress in the interview and the book, is that you can get the stress out of your body, even when you can’t control the stressors in your life.

I found that tremendously comforting.

The first step is always to let yourself feel the emotions—all the way through.

Then, you need to get the stress out of your body. Read More→

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Mar
06

The Different “Flavors” of Grief

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I have been writing about grief a lot lately, partly because we are all going through it in one way or another. If it’s not the grief of someone actually dying from COVID or other reasons, it’s the grief of a loss of a way of life that was suddenly ripped away a year ago. And many kinds of losses in between.

Plus, I’m walking through the valley of grief myself, as well as alongside many of my clients.

It strikes me that there are several distinct “flavors” of grief, at least two of which few people even talk about.

The Grief of Losing What You Had

This is the first and most obvious grief. You had something precious–a relationship, a business, a dream, a home—and it was somehow lost.

The “flavor” of this grief is bittersweet.

Sweet, because at one time you did experience something good. The lack of that now is what’s bitter.

The steps of Grief Recovery, along with The Healing Codes, heal this grief over time. Read More→

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If you weren’t dealing with grief before the global pandemic, I suspect you’re dealing with it now, in one way or another. Who hasn’t lost something in the pandemic, even if it’s only the familiar way of being able to “do life”?

Many are dealing with loss of so much more. Loss of health. Loss of a loved one (including a pet). Loss of connections. Loss of work, of income. Loss of a sense of stability. Loss of a dream. Loss of faith. Loss of a marriage.

If you have unhealed grief issues from the past, likely any of the more recent losses just make the grief feel even worse. Grief is cumulative, and time does not automatically heal it. That is a myth.

Dr. Bernard McGrane, Professor of Sociology at Chapman University, says that “unresolved grief is the major underlying issue in most people’s lives.” Incomplete recovery from grief can have lifelong negative effects on your capacity for happiness—not to mention your health.

If you’ve felt that your healing has not progressed as you would like, it could well be that unhealed grief is the block.

If you were to tally all the losses of your life, how many would you say feel resolved? Read More→

Nov
21

Grief, Grace, Gratitude, and Grit

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My mother left this earth on November 19, 2020. Marie Boos Filakovsky was 88.

There is grief. It’s showing up as lethargy, insomnia, fatigue, and sadness. I am always amazed at how strong the mother-daughter bond is.

Mom and I had a complicated relationship. The product of Childhood Emotional Neglect herself, she passed that on. She married a good man, my father, and lived out the 1950s script of a good Catholic girl, wife, and mother.

Mom and me, Aug. 2017

I never knew who she really was.

Until she was 78.

That’s when I started giving her custom Healing Codes. And I watched her change.

The changes in my mother solidified for me the power of The Healing Codes.

I can still remember the day she asked me how I was doing—and meant it. Before that, our weekly calls were mostly about her. It didn’t feel like she really was interested in me. Until that day.

From then on, she opened her heart more and more. I discovered to my astonishment that she had a tender, sensitive heart. For most of her life, she had hidden it under layers of socialization. Once she said to me, “You are giving me what I should have given you,” i.e. emotional support.

Then she had a stroke. And a second one, in 2017. After that, communication was very difficult. In a way, I lost the mother I’d just found.

A few weeks ago she was put on palliative care, and it was really difficult not to go out there. But with COVID-19, I just couldn’t risk flying out, for her sake and mine. I was told that it was too taxing for her to talk on the phone.

It was so hard, being cut off from her in her last days. Read More→

October 2020 marked my 10-year anniversary of getting certified as a Healing Codes Coach/Practitioner by Dr. Alex Loyd.

What an amazing and wonderful 10 years it’s been!

So much healing, and so much learned.

A therapist friend said to me, after finding out some things about my past, “How did YOU come out of all that? I mean, someone who is able to do what you do and have done in the world, usually doesn’t come out of THAT kind of background.”

Answer: God’s grace, and a lot of hard work on my part. Also these:

  • Believing somehow that anything can be overcome, if only I have the faith and the willingness to do the hard work of transformation.
  • A willingness to learn, and most of all, a desire to grow. To grow beyond the confines of a narrow, emotionally deficient background and trauma.

I believe you also have those qualities, or you wouldn’t be reading my blog. YOU are the kind of self-aware person who desires to heal your heart issues—those negative memories, beliefs and feelings that block you from experiencing the love, joy, peace, purpose and self-fulfillment you sense is your God-given design.

And because you are that kind of person, and to celebrate some of the most fulfilling (as well as challenging) last 10 years of my work, I want to give you something that will speed your Healing Code results—if you choose to use it. Read More→

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