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In Part Two in this series on Hidden Stressors, I talked about trauma.
How there are no “little t” traumas. Traumas have to do with how the nervous system responded to an event that was overwhelming at the time. Some people, especially highly sensitive people, may have more finely-tuned nervous systems that take in more information—hence, may be more susceptible to trauma.
I just finished watching hours of the Trauma Superconference 3 that aired the replays recently. It made me realize that a lot of us are carrying around unhealed, even unknown trauma in our nervous systems.
These traumas may be triggered by the recent (and current) collective trauma of the COVID-19 pandemic.
Especially the trauma of unmet needs. Read More→
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I have really sharp clients. Often, because they are in the process of healing and transformation and getting more and more aligned with their divine design, they come up with nuggets of wisdom.
Here’s something from Laura W. (who gave me permission to share it):
“When we’re being asked to grow, the stretching often hurts. But it’s not: I have to do all these modalities to fix me. Rather, it’s a healing curriculum, it’s a certain kind of container I think of as Purpose Academy. College is one kind of container: you learn specific skills, but then you have to go out and live it to really get it and achieve mastery. But all of life is Purpose Academy—there’s a purpose to what God allows in, and it’s all for us to better discern our own purpose.”
Well said, Laura! Your transformation has been awesome.
I especially like what she said about doing things like The Healing Codes not to fix us, as if we’re broken. We may feel broken, but it’s more like we’re wounded, and the wounds knock us out of alignment with our divine design, our unique purpose for being on this earth. Through the rigors of Purpose Academy, the wounds are revealed so that they can be healed. When we heal those wounds, spiritually and energetically, then we can come into that Alignment. Read More→
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diane
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Are you bothered by what’s going on in the world?
Perhaps you, like me, find that Emotional Inflammation flares strongly. (Emotional Inflammation: a state “not unlike post-traumatic stress disorder, but one that stems from simply living in today’s tumultuous world.”) The mass shooting in a Texas grammar school–horrific in itself—only added to the other troubling ongoing world events. War in Ukraine. Warnings of impending food shortages, and maybe another pandemic. Etc. etc.
And, to top it all off, four events springing up in my personal life underscored that evil’s presence is everywhere.
It can make you feel powerless. Hopeless. Paralyzed with fear.
When I feel powerless, I connect and align with the Source of all power. I prayed.
As I prayed, an idea formed.
What if I created an opportunity for people of faith to unite in prayer, while doing a Coach-Guided Healing Code, to push back the darkness?
I’ve already witnessed, again and again, the power of combined intention.
I’ve already seen that there is one prayer God always seemed to answer.
So why not unite to pray that prayer, and add a custom, coach-guided Healing Code as we do?
No one has to do The Healing Code part, by the way. I want you to share this with people who might not be familiar with The Healing Codes, but who do want to pray. Those unfamiliar with The Healing Codes will be pointed to resources that will explain it and show how to do it, if they care to learn.
The Healing Codes are simply a tool that clears the negative energy at a quantum level, which I believe amplifies the power of prayer. It’s an energetic technology that makes things manifest in the physical world, faster and easier—like using the remote garage door opener instead of getting out of your car to open the garage door. The frequency-based technology that sends a signal to open the door makes that task much easier than opening the door without it, but neither one is “morally” better than the other.
Using The Healing Codes with prayer is like turning up the speakers in a stereo system: you need the sound in the first place (that’s the prayer part), but then you can turn up the speakers to create more powerful sound (in this analogy, to amplify the frequency of the prayer on that energetic level, so that results in the physical world are more easily manifested).
The authors of Emotional Inflammation suggest one way to regain emotional equilibrium during anxious times is to direct your energy into thoughtful, deliberate action. That is what this event will be. We will unite our intention, our faith in God’s power, and direct it into the various spheres of life, from politics and government to the educational system to the media and more.
If you are interested in joining this prayer event, sign up here so that I can give you more details. Signing up will also give you access to download the recording, so that you can pray and do this Healing Code again and again.
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diane
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Have you ever been in a relationship in which you want to love the other person, but you and they are coming from such different places, that all you can do is set a firm boundary and try not to get sucked in to all the drama or manipulation or dysfunction?
In such a relationship, often the other person wants something from you, and will resort to all sorts of manipulation tactics to get it. Some examples might be:
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guilt-tripping and attempting to pull you into the Dreaded Drama Triangle by trying to make you the rescuer or perpetrator of their victimhood
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gaslighting, where they ignore, distort or twist your words, actions or intentions to something other than you meant
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playing on and exploiting your generous or compassionate nature, knowing that you want to think of yourself in these ways so will do what they want to keep up your image of yourself.
Having dealt with a few of these relationships in my life has been an interesting experience. (By the way, as I’ve healed and Aligned more and more with my Divine Design, there have been fewer such relationships in my life. That can be true for you, too.)
Photo by Brands&People on Unsplash
In these unhealthy relationships, I saw all my “buttons” that were being pushed, and that awareness was actually a gift. It was an invitation to more transformation and growth. Self-awareness led to consciously healing the issues, with more of a sense of freedom and personal empowerment as a result.
I want to say a special word to you if you were born with the trait of High Sensitivity. (If you’re not sure, go here to find out more and take the quiz.)
We who are Highly Sensitive seem prone to attracting dysfunctional people. I think there might be some kind of invisible energetic radar that certain people like narcissists and predators pick up on. They can somehow sense the kind-hearted, generous people who will give anyone the shirt off their back.
It was so very helpful for me to become aware of this dynamic. It has led to a lot of discomfort, since I’m not used to being as “hard-nosed” as I’ve had to be in dealing with these kinds of relationships. I’ve had to contend with guilt, judgment (from the other person who knows this is one of my buttons, as well as myself), and the cognitive dissonance of having to “turn off” some of my best traits (like compassion) when I recognized the other person’s attempts to exploit them.
I’ve had to initiate some uncomfortable conversations in which I confronted the person with truths they didn’t want to hear, and who would then berate me to others for it.
And I’ve had to remind myself a lot of the wonderful 12 words I think God gave me awhile ago to deal with my guilt over not rescuing people from their own folly: “You must allow others the dignity of living with their choices.”
I’m also grateful for such painful relationship experiences because I think they help me understand perhaps a bit of what God might feel toward us, his children.
God longs for a close relationship with us. Too often, our distorted thinking and attempts to make him be what we want him to be, rather than who he truly is, make a relationship impossible. Yes, God can do anything. But he won’t do this: he won’t violate our free will. He himself allows each of us “the dignity of living with our choices.”
Even if that choice is to live in eternity without him.
I guess God prizes freedom that much.
(Do we?)
If you too would like to transform some old negative patterns and Align with Your Divine DesignTM , check out my coaching at HealingCodesCoaching.com.
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diane
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Do you watch the news constantly—or not at all?
The continuous news cycle—especially these days—can give one a massive case of Emotional Inflammation, which the authors of that book called a sort of PTSD characterized by what one client called “a dark cloud of energy” around her.
I admit—I never used to watch or even keep up with the news at all. It just felt like too much; I’d always get a bad case of Emotional Inflammation.
Now I’ve found a better way.
First of all, I never watch the news; I only read the news. Images tend to stick in the mind and heart, and are much harder to filter than thoughts.
I skim a wide variety of sources. News sources are so polarized these days, you have to read widely to come to something close to the truth.
Because of my training in subtle energy testing, perhaps it’s easier for me to sense the lies. I can feel it in my body. That helps.
What I do to combat the Emotional Inflammation is to use the news as a springboard for prayer.
I pray this one simple prayer: “God, shine your life-giving light into this [name of situation], to expose evil, reveal truth, and point our feet to the path of peace.”
When I read the news, especially now, I’m always looking for evidence of that prayer being answered. I rejoice when I see answers. I keep praying this prayer into the dark situations I see.
This practice goes a long way to mitigate Emotional Inflammation and keep me in a state of hope, peace, and even joy when I see what seem like answers to this prayer.
But it’s not always enough, especially for a Highly Sensitive Person who picks up on energy easily. So I always include “emotional inflammation” in my own Healing Codes practice.
I invite you to do the same. There is a custom Healing Code for Emotional Inflammation on the Navigating the Times page, just for you. (I ask that you sign up so I can alert you to when I update the page with new resources.)
And if you need help healing the heart issues that come up from living in these unprecedented times, check out my coaching at HealingCodesCoaching.com.
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This is the time of year (Advent and Hanukkah) when people of certain spiritual traditions identify with “the people living in darkness awaiting the light” (see Isaiah 9, Luke 1:78-79).
Maybe you can identify? Is there any darkness in your world, any longing for the comfort of the light?
The other night, I woke too early and I could not get back to sleep. There was so much going on in my life, so much that has happened in the last year (and two), I guess I still needed to process some of it. Plus I was burning my candles on both ends. (Strange thing with me: the later I get to bed, the earlier I wake up.)
As I lay in the deep darkness of the winter night, the words that are the basis of so much of my healing work came to me: “the life-giving light of the Lord Jesus Christ shines in all the darkness, and brings complete healing, peace, and right relationships with God, self and others.”
I couldn’t stop saying it over and over in my mind. Then I started asking God to shine his life-giving light into various people’s lives, naming each one. All this brought incredible peace to me.
It really is the mantra for Advent, for Christmas. The great hope is that the light has come into the world, the light that conquers the darkness, the light that the darkness never has and never can overcome.
Light always, always banishes darkness, instantly.
So this Advent and Hanukkah season, whether it’s your spiritual tradition or not, I invite you to affirm, as often as needed, “the life-giving light of God Almighty (or Jesus Christ) shines in all the darkness, and brings complete healing, peace, and right relationships with God, self and others.”
And after the affirmation, you can add a prayer for this Light to shine into the world, through you and others, “to shine on those living in darkness and the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace.”
Thus YOU become the light of the world as well.
And if you want more Light to shine in your life . . . if you have any darkness that needs to be banished, I invite you to check out my coaching at HealingCodesCoaching.com.
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diane
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This Thanksgiving I’m going to conduct a spiritual experiment of sorts.
It’s typical to give thanks for the good things in life.
I want to go further. I want to be as grateful for the hard things, the seemingly “bad” things–the things I don’t like about my life, even the things I hate and wish would go away.
The things I call in Abundant Gifts “disguised gifts.”
You see, in my years of attempting to live “the Abundant Gifts way,” I have developed a theory of how things work in the spiritual realm.
My theory, in a nutshell, is that when we, in faith, receive even the difficult, unwanted things in life as a gift, that somehow triggers that thing to become a blessing eventually in some way.
I don’t think that all things automatically or necessarily turn out for the good. Scripture says that God works all things together for good “to those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”
In other words, to those who live by faith, who are Aligned with their Divine Design.
It’s difficult to express how this might work. I don’t want to say that our faith “allows” God to turn a curse into a blessing, exactly. Yet I wonder if that is somehow how it works. If you shut God out of certain aspects of your life, how can he work things out for your good? But if in faith you welcome his grace into the situation, then he is “free” to work things out as promised.
There are definitely things in my life I do not welcome. Yet, in faith, I recognize that I probably do not see the big picture. How often, in retrospect, did you experience something that was not pleasant at the moment, but later turned out to be a gift in some way?
So now, at this moment, though I do not see the blessing in some of my circumstances, I believe that it’s possible for God to turn it into something good.
So I will thank God for everything, good or not apparently so good, this Thanksgiving. I can pray, “God, I don’t understand how this thing can possibly be good in any way. But in faith, I believe you can turn it into something good. So I thank you for allowing this into my life, and I will wait, in hope and faith, for you to transform this into blessing in some way.”
I’m very interested in your response. Should we give thanks for all things? Post your comment on the blog by clicking “comments,” please.
And if you would like some personalized help in removing the blocks that keep you from being Aligned with Your Divine DesignTM , check out my coaching at HealingCodesCoaching.com.
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diane
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Do you ever feel overwhelmed by all that’s coming at you, all there is to do?
I know I do. As someone with the inborn trait of High Sensitivity (or Sensory Processing Sensitivity, its technical term), I take in a lot more information than non-HSPs, and process it more deeply. Understanding this has hugely helped me to understand what’s going on, but I still have to deal with it all.
On top of that, there’s this tendency to “overthink” things. One of my gifts is that I can often see down the road to just how something will play out, for me or others. I’m usually right. However, I’m finding that you still have to walk through all the steps to get there. (I just want to leap frog to the end that I can see so clearly.)
So what do you do when you have to make decisions and move ahead, when there’s so much to sort through and it’s difficult even to know what’s most important to do so you can set priorities?
Remember that famous quote by Scarlett O’Hara from Gone with the Wind? (“I’ll think about that tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day.”) That’s what we feel like doing, isn’t it? There are times when we do have to just take a break, but you know the “mañana” attitude doesn’t get you very far in life.
Here’s what I’ve found helpful.
Step 1: Pray. I pray for wisdom, knowing that God desires to give it and to guide me.
Prayer also reminds me that it’s not all up to me, that there’s a lot I can’t control, and that a loving God desires to help me.
One of my favorite verses is, “For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, ‘Fear not, I am the one who helps you’” (Isaiah 41:13). Such tenderness and kindness in that Word!
Here’s another one of my favorite promises: “The LORD himself goes before you, and is with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be discouraged; do not be afraid” (Deuteronomy 31:8).
And finally, this: “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Acknowledge Him, in all your ways, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6).
Reminding myself of these promises from God’s Word helps me to trust that he will guide and help me as I step out in faith.
Step 2: List out all the things that I’m dealing with, all the decisions to be made. This is how I mind map. I do this on paper usually, to get things out of my head, where it can feel overwhelming. Seeing it all written out helps me look at everything more objectively.
Step 3: Triage the decisions. When I’m facing a lot of decisions and not sure what to do, I look at the probable outcomes of acting now, acting later, or not acting at all. The decisions that have the worst outcomes if I don’t act now get priority. The trick here is to make sure you take into account the not-so-obvious, and/or longer-term consequences.
Conversely, you can ask the famous One Thing question: “What’s the ONE Thing I can do such that by doing it everything else will be easier or unnecessary?”
Between looking at the worst outcomes and the one thing that will yield the best results, it should become easier to prioritize. But there are other factors to consider.
Step 4: Clarify what I do and don’t want. I have a tool for this that I use with some of my clients, which helps tremendously to clarify my real desires and fears. It’s important to take these into account as well, because fears can block you and desires can fuel you into getting what you want.
Step 5: Tune in to my Heart and intuition. Having gathered all this information, I then pray again and tune into my Heart/Spirit. I know there are factors of which my spirit or subconscious may be aware, that my mind is not. I have learned to trust that vehicle of transmission from Spirit to mind, my intuition. I wait to things to “jell” into a Clear Next Step.
Once I get that Clear Next Step, I then have peace. All I need to focus on is my own Clear Next Step. Everything else is up to God and perhaps other people to do their parts.
Another important thing: I don’t proceed until I get that Next Clear Step. I continue to pray, and wait. I only act when I have a Clear Next Step.
This is a process, a continual process.
Often when I take one Clear Next Step, the next clear step presents itself. If it doesn’t, I wait and pray, or go through the above process again.
Try this with any decisions or tasks that tend to overwhelm you, and let me know what happens.
And if you would like help with this or any other “heart issue,” check out my coaching at https://HealingCodesCoaching.com.
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diane
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The voicemail was less than two minutes long. It was intended to hurt and to arouse guilt and fear.
For a few hours, it succeeded. In that time I felt, thought, and prayed my way through it all.
Then God stepped in and “flipped the switch,” giving me the miracle of several shifts in perspective.
(I wrote before about how we can deliberately “flip the switch” from positive to negative. But sometimes we need God to do it, because we don’t know how or we’re too upset to remember to do it. That’s the time to pray and ask God to open your eyes to a different way of seeing.) Read More→
