Archive for Perspectives from Scripture
“Misery Loves Company”-Why?
Posted by: | CommentsI was getting to know a new acquaintance the other day, and the conversation drifted to the time when my mother died and I had to settle her estate with a co-executor who had her own views of reality. I mentioned it was a very toxic situation, with the fallout being I had to cut myself off from two of my siblings and their families.
My new friend quickly shared she’d had a very similar experience. We compared notes, and offered each other empathy. I shared a detail that shocked her. “I just can’t imagine what that would be like,” she said.
There’s a saying that “misery loves company.” I thought of that as my friend and I talked.
Why does misery love company?
I don’t think it’s because we’re intrinsically mean. I think it’s something else altogether.
When Cathy was shocked by the detail I shared, I felt validated.
It really was that bad, what I went through. Cathy saw it, and validated it with her empathy.
I validated her situation, too. It really was bad for both of us.
My therapist friend told me that every single client of hers who has Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) has a part of them that believes “it wasn’t really that bad.” We minimize the experience for two reasons: to minimize the pain, and because we were constantly gaslit to believe it wasn’t that bad. We must be the problem if we think there was a problem.
When someone listens, really listens, and empathizes with the emotion behind what you’re saying, that validation is quite healing. I’m not talking mere sympathy here, where you feel sorry for someone. Empathy is when you feel with another person—and they can tell the difference. Sympathy can be demeaning, but empathy is validating.
I think that’s one of the most valuable aspects of good coaching. Some clients have never really been heard or seen and validated for who they are or how they feel. In a supportive group, it can be even more powerful.
Being validated by another person is crucial, but so is self-validation. Be kind and compassionate to yourself when difficult feelings or memories arise, and remind yourself that you are doing the best you can with what you have, and have always done that. Remind yourself how much God loves you: Jesus died for you. You are loved, honored, and precious in God’s sight (Isaiah 43:4).
Plus—probably anyone would feel the way you do if they were in your shoes. (Anyone with a heart who isn’t being gaslit, that is.)
Jesus healed through compassion (Matthew 9:36, 14:14, 15:32). He extends that to you. You can add self-compassion to that as well.
Misery loves company only until the misery is validated. Validation triggers release, and then you (or another person) can move on.
Quantum Physics, Spirituality, And Your Thoughts
Posted by: | CommentsThese days I’m diving deeper into an exploration of quantum physics. It is a totally fascinating subject to me, and I’m especially interested in how it dovetails with the Bible and prayer.
Charity Kayembe, the daughter of Dr. Mark Virkler, has herself delved into this subject, and did a podcast with Julie Smith of the ElijahForce podcast recently.
Photo by FlyD
I find Charity and Mark Virkler refreshing in that they are both deeply biblical and open to things like actually hearing from and experiencing God, not just through the Bible, but through one’s one inner experiences and dreams—yet filtered through a biblical framework.
In the interview, Charity and Julie touched on the concepts of superposition, quantum entanglement, and my favorite, the observer effect. They explored biblical examples, contemporary testimonies, and then put what we learned into practice with a powerful activation meditation at the end.
If you find this intriguing, too, you can watch the interview on Rumble or check it out on Facebook here.
The Quantum and Your Brain
Dr. Caroline Leaf says in quantum science this observation–that “whatever you think about most, grows”–is called the Quantum Zeno Effect and describes how focused, intentional attention on thoughts or behaviors can solidify neural pathways—essentially shaping the brain through conscious repetition. It emphasizes the power of paying deliberate attention to thoughts for growth or transformation.
Learn more from her podcast: Cleaning up Your Mental Mess.
My Gratitude Challenge
Posted by: | CommentsHave you noticed that the older you get, the bigger the challenges seem to be?
Whether it’s your own health or the health of a loved one, an estranged family member, children who are struggling (seems like so many young people are struggling these days), financial woes, societal issues—all seem to hit harder as we age. (Or is it just me?)
And sometimes everything seems to crash down at once.If you find yourself struggling to keep your head above the waters of adversity, you might try something I’ve been doing that has empowered me.
Photo by Alex Padurariu
There are two aspects to this.
The first is to realize the “50/50 of life”: that on average, life is 50% good and 50% bad or unpleasant.
Now, sometimes we’re in a place where it’s 25% good, 75% “bad,” and we need to acknowledge that. I have learned the hard way that refusing to acknowledge the “sucky” parts of life only pushes the negative feelings down, where they could end up manifesting in some kind of bodily symptom.
Even so, acknowledging that life is both “good” and “bad” or difficult, will keep you grounded.
Then, the challenge becomes to consciously look for good, the joyful, the beautiful, the noble, the hopeful. As Paul the Apostle wrote (from prison, mind you), whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Philippians 4:8).
Photo by Erwan Hesry
Celebrate whatever you can.
No doubt you’ve heard all this before (but reminders don’t hurt). The thing I’m adding, my “gratitude challenge,” is to ask of the things that don’t go my way, “How can this be good?”
Since I believe the promise of Romans 8:28, that God works all things together for good to those who love him and are called to his purpose, I trust that God can bring something good out of anything.
Some people believe that God deliberately brings hard things in their lives to “teach them something.” To me, that lines up more with the feeling of a punitive parent rather than the compassionate God I have come to know.
So what I believe is this: That this world is not yet as it should be (see Genesis 3), but God is busy turning that around.
“Behold, I am making all things new” Jesus promises in the last book of the Bible. It’s one of my favorite verses. I think of this work as the current job description of the Holy Spirit.
I’ve seen it in so many instances in my life, and I’m sure you can too, if you look: times when God turned something “bad” into something good in some way.
Not just always to “teach us a lesson,” but to bring us somehow more into the kind of person who reflects his qualities of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self-control.
When I ask, “How can this be good?” my imagination is engaged as I think of possible ways something good can come out of a bad situation. And I remind myself that God is infinitely more creative than me; he can think up—and execute—many more positive possibilities than I can.
Imagining possible good outcomes shifts your brain and your energy from fear, anxiety, anger, etc., to curiosity, which is a higher vibration. Who knows, could this make it easier, so to speak, for God to actually bring something good out of the situation? Could it make us more receptive to what God wants to do in our life? I wonder . . .
Photo by Gabrielle Henderson
Another “higher vibration” switch is to allow yourself to feel gratitude, and actively thank God for either something else that is good in your life, or the fact that he can bring good out of this bad situation.
Keeping a gifts journal has proved a tremendous help with all this. Not only does it enable me to refocus on the positive things in my life, but it provides a written record of how God did the second thing—turn “bad” into something good—which bolsters my faith.
Perhaps this Thanksgiving, whether you celebrate it or not, you can start, restart, or gladly continue the practice of keeping a gifts journal and exercising your imagination to think of possible ultimately good outcomes to the challenges you face.
As you do, you will be practicing that “both/and” thinking that I talked about last week, that fosters resilience: “this unpleasant thing is both difficult, and I am grateful that __________.”
Fill in the blank with the pleasant aspects of your life, and/or the possibilities of good that you envision.
See if that can help you find a ray of joy even in the darkest of times. It does for me.
Photo by Clark Wilson
Related articles:
Politics, Evil, Discernment, Grace, And Prayer
Posted by: | CommentsIn my last blog, I talked about former President Donald Trump’s close brush with an assassin’s bullet being a miracle. An answer to the prayer that evil will be thwarted.
Photo by Ben White
One reader objected. She wrote, in part:
“It hurts my heart to hear people say that somehow God spared Trump. Especially people I have respected like yourself.
“Any assassination attempt is reprehensible.
“I don’t condone violence of any kind.
“I guess if Trump had been killed things could have gone out of control because a group of his violent-leaning followers would have probably tried to incite a civil war.
“And we were spared that.
“I hope that’s what you mean when you talk about a miracle.
“But the man who lost his life – should not have lost his life.
“Access to guns by troubled people is way too easy in this country.
“We have lost too many beautiful children in schools because of gun violence. Why were those beautiful souls not spared?
“. . . Trump was just lucky.”
She then went on to express her thoughts about Donald Trump.
Here’s what I answered: Read More→
Were You Part Of This Miracle?
Posted by: | CommentsEvery week, I include in my newsletter my exhortation to “be a light and push back the darkness.” I give you a prayer. I know many of you have joined me in praying that prayer.
I add a couple more words to what is in the image. I pray, “Dear God, shine your light into this dark world, to expose and thwart evil, reveal truth, and guide our feet in the paths of peace.”
Last week, I believe we saw evidence of God answering that prayer as former President Donald Trump’s life was spared when he turned his head just enough, and just in time, for the bullet to only graze his ear rather than hit the bulls-eye of his head.
Many are calling it “a miracle” or “Providence.”
I call it an answer to people’s prayers. Perhaps yours.
Whatever your political views are, if you’re a follower of Christ you should be seeking peace, and praying for our leaders, as the Bible commands. We partner with God’s work in the world through our prayers. Read More→
The Power of Being Witnessed
Posted by: | CommentsI was very moved this morning when I read a passage in the Gospel of Luke. To me, it was a powerful demonstration of the importance of being witnessed in the healing journey.
The context: Jesus was on his way to heal the only daughter of Jairus, the local synagogue leader. The girl was near death, and I’m sure the father was desperate for Jesus to get there as soon as possible.
Photo by Kevin McCutcheon
The crowd jostled Jesus as he moved along. Among them was a woman who had been hemorrhaging for twelve years. She’d spent all her money on doctors, none of whom had helped her. She was desperate for Jesus to heal her. She believed if only she could touch the hem of his garment, she would be healed.
She crept up next to him, and did exactly that. Instantly she felt in her body that she was healed.
Jesus felt it too. He felt healing energy flow from him. He asked, “Who touched me?”
Peter reminded him that all kinds of people were pressing in on him. Jesus insisted, “Someone did touch me, for I was aware that power had left me.” (Those skeptical of energy healing, take note!)
The woman, realizing she couldn’t hide any longer, came forth trembling and fell down before Him. She admitted in the presence of all the people the reason she had touched Him, and how she had been immediately healed. Read More→
How Can You Feel Safe in an Unsafe World?
Posted by: | CommentsRecently two things happened that triggered my nervous system into feeling unsafe. One was on the communal level, the other more personal.
Here’s what God did for me. Maybe it will help you feel a little more safe too.
On the communal level, I heard the news that the FBI issued a public safety warning for the holidays. Nothing specific, just that that FBI Director Christopher Wray sees “blinking red [warning] lights everywhere.” He says not to panic, but to be vigilant.
Photo by Goh Rhy Yan
Great. Hyper-vigilance is something I’m working on healing! In trying to heal trauma from my childhood (and beyond), I’ve worked hard on feeling safe. How can one feel safe in a world where the Director of the FBI is saying that “I’ve never seen a time when so many of the threats are all elevated, all at exactly the same time”?
To top it off, I received a letter from my state representative about safety concerns. We’ve never gotten a letter like that before. It makes you wonder what “they” (the FBI, the government officials) know that we don’t.
On a personal level, a past toxic situation and relationship that I thought was squarely in the past suddenly crashed again into my life.
I want to tell you how being able to connect with God brought great comfort and strength and sucked the stress right out of both situations.
After I got the sudden text and phone message, I related it to my children. My son wisely said, “Ignore it until X happens. Don’t give it any mental bandwidth.”
Good advice, except that my nervous system didn’t get it.
I told a couple of close friends who were familiar with the history of my situation, and they prayed for me.
I prayed too, of course. And what I got was a vision of sorts, a meditation God gave me to dwell on.
(When I say “vision,” I mean an impression on my spirit that is somewhat visual. It’s “seeing with the eyes of my heart.” That is how I often receive messages from God.)
The first part was simply of a castle or fortress, with a moat all around it. The mote was water with fire on top of it.
No fire here, but the castle is like in my vision, only higher up.
The next day, in my dialogue with God in my Morning Pages journal, the image was added to: I was taken up by angels into the castle (there was no way to get there otherwise, what with the water and fire). I was transported to an area of the castle where I was to stay, “while your special rooms were being prepared.” That “place” I understood would be perfectly designed for who I am.
In the meantime, however, I would have to live in more “public” places, perhaps not so perfectly designed for me, but livable. (I’ve had a lot of dreams lately about being in public places. As an Introvert and Highly Sensitive Person, I’m often wearied by a lot of ”public” obligations. This vision put those dreams and feelings in context.)
I was content to live in the more public places because I knew now they were temporary. A perfect place was being prepared for me (see John 14), and though the meantime was less than perfect, it was fine for now.
This “vision” comforts me.
Photo by micheile henderson
First of all, it signals safety to my nervous system in a way that my body could receive better than just trying to put something out of my mind. (It will still live in the nervous system anyway.) What the nervous system needs is not words or reasoning, but a new “picture in the heart.” The body’s language is nonverbal. The “survival brain” runs on pictures in the heart.
That new picture of safety is what the vision is giving me. I felt safe in that castle surrounded by the moat that you could only cross via air, spiritually (i.e. the angels carrying me over). The water and fire to me signify baptism (water and the Holy Spirit), recalling a sermon I heard recently about how we can go back to the fact of our baptism to remind us that “we are sealed by the Holy Spirit and belong to God forever.”
Knowing that I had to put up with living in the public spaces because a special place was being prepared for me helped me to feel like I could cope with the obligations that sometimes can seem so onerous to me.
I don’t know if that picture speaks to you or not. You can always pray for your own picture of safety.
Photo by Wilfried Santer
The Bible is full of images of safety. The Psalms in particular offer many images of safety (e.g. Psalm 18, where God is pictured as a rock, a refuge).
Indeed, my vision is based on the verse that the name of the Lord is a “fortress” to which we can run and be safe (Proverbs 18:10). Only in my case, I had to be flown over the moat by an angel!
(This, by the way, is how you know if something is truly from God: It needs to square with Scripture in some way. I’ve been reading through the Bible every two years since 2004, so my “pool” is well-stocked with things God can draw from.)
God had given me another precious picture of safety in an Immanuel Prayer experience, after a tragedy that rocked my world. I did a video on that. I called it “King Jesus Faces Down Evil.” I often return to that as well.
This world as it is is not always safe. If we’ve had trauma in our lives (and most of us have, of one sort or another, as Dr. Gabor Maté points out in his newest book, The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture), then we can be prone to being easily triggered into anxiety.
If we can address that anxiety by feeding the “survival brain” new images (among other approaches), it can help us be resilient, hopeful, healthily vigilant, and resourceful, adequate to meet the challenges of world that is not always safe or healthy.
Some other verses that calm my nervous system:
- “In this world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” (Words of Jesus in John 16:33)
- The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness have never overcome it (John 1:5).
- “Behold, I am making all things new.” (Some of Jesus’ last recorded words, in Revelation 21:5.)
- Zechariah’s prophecy about the baby Jesus:
“And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High;
for you will go before the Lord to prepare his ways,
to give knowledge of salvation to his people
in the forgiveness of their sins,
because of the tender mercy of our God,
whereby the sunrise shall visit us from on high
to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death,
to guide our feet into the way of peace.” (Luke 1: 76-79)
If you would like to grow in your ability to hear from God, I invite you to check out my Align with Your Divine Design program. In Module 2, Connect, I teach you four ways to learn how to hear the voice of God. This is the foundation of the whole program. There’s nothing like being able to experience God. In fact, Richard Rohr has said, “An experience of God is necessary for mental and emotional health.” I totally agree!
Call for Prayer for Victims of War
Posted by: | CommentsThe Hamas terrorist attacks on Israel on October 7, 2023 are shocking and horrific, and now is the time, more than ever, to pray the prayer below.
The most disturbing thing to me was the report that people around the world were rejoicing over the killing of innocent people, the raping and kidnapping of women, children, and the elderly. Hamas was sending out videos of the atrocities they were committing, as if they are proud of it. The Nazis at least tried to hide it.
It also seems that the terrorists care nothing about the citizens of Palestine, either. They are quite willing to sacrifice them, too. Israel had always gone to great lengths to protect civilians when they were about to attack. (Note: Please don’t click on the link above unless you don’t believe me. If you’re sensitive, don’t click on it. Just trust me.)
Who rejoices over destruction, death, and suffering? Only those sold out to evil. Those who actually believe they are pleasing God by acts of atrocity. (What kind of god, you may ask, would encourage such a thing?)
Who protects and defends the innocent? Only those who value life. (The Israelis have always done everything they can to warn Palestinian civilians to evacuate before they bomb. Hamas hides their headquarters and military assets behind or under mosques, hospitals, schools. Hamas tells their citizens not to leave their buildings.)
As Ben Shapiro points out in this podcast explaining why he’s showing pictures of the atrocities, the terrorists don’t think like you do. They do not have the same values.
It seems to not be fashionable to call something or someone evil. But what else would you call it? “Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter!” (Isaiah 5:20) I will call it what it is.
And I will hate it. In the scriptures, it says to hate evil. Not evil people–we pray for them as our enemies–but evil itself. And we do what we can to eradicate it, if necessary.
The desire to enslave or destroy the Jews entirely has reared its ugly head since the days of Moses. Yet God has never allowed that to happen, and he never will, if you believe the Bible (and history).
Perhaps not coincidentally, this very week I have been reading the Book of Esther in my regular two-year Bible reading plan. It is one of my favorite books of the Old Testament, and it’s quite timely now. The poetic justice in this story is very sweet. (I pray, “Do it again, God! Do it again. Deliver your people yet again.”)
(Interesting note: in Esther, Haman was the enemy that tried to destroy the Jews. Now it’s Hamas. One letter different.)
Prayer is a big part of spiritual victory of any kind. So pray the prayer below. Pray it often, pray it from the heart. You will be doing something important.
We are not battling against flesh and blood, ultimately (Ephesians 6:12).
This is a spiritual war, fought with spiritual weapons, which are more powerful than any earthly artillery.
Don’t forget . . .
Be a light and push back the darkness!
(Have you been paying attention to how God is answering this prayer? That’s how I read the news now….)
Are You Open to Healing Happening in an Unexpected Way?
Posted by: | CommentsWhenever I come across the same idea two or three times within a couple of days, I figure it’s something to pay attention to.
Especially if it’s from Scripture.
This week, the idea that healing can come through unexpected means came up twice on the same day. So I thought I’d pay close attention, and share it with you.
The first time was through a devotional app I really enjoy. It’s called Lectio 365, and each day there is a morning and evening audio (and printed words), using the simple outline of P-R-A-Y: Pause, Rejoice & Reflect, Ask, and Yield.
Photo by Mathilde Normandeau on Unsplash
The Scripture selection for reflection on July 26 was from John 5:5-9a, about the man who spent years by the pool of Bethesda, waiting for a miracle. Jesus sees him, knows that he has been sick for a long time, and asks him a pointed question: “Do you want to be healed?”
The man explains why he can’t be healed: “I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going, another steps down before me.” His chance at being healed was slim to none—or so he thought.
The devotional points out that at this point, the sick man knew only one way to be healed: to get into the pool first when the water is stirred up. “But Jesus expands his limited imagination with an invitation to action; ‘Get up, pick up your bed, and start walking.’”
And the man did!
That very same day, I was reading through my two-year Bible reading plan, and came to the story of Naaman in 2 Kings 5, who had some kind of serious skin disease. He was general of the army under the king of Aram, and very valuable to the king. A girl from Israel who had been captured and ended up being the servant of Naaman’s wife told her that there was a prophet in Israel who could tell Naaman how to be healed.
Naaman first went to the king of Israel for help, but that king recognized his grave limitations in being able to heal, and referred Naaman to Elisha the prophet.
Naaman came to Elisha, all decked out with gifts. Elisha didn’t even bother to meet him in person; he sent his servant with a message to Naaman: “Go to the River Jordan and immerse yourself seven times. Your skin will be healed and you’ll be as good as new.”
This totally offended Naaman. He lost his temper, and fumed, “I thought he’d personally come out and meet me, call on the name of the LORD, wave his hand over the diseased spot, and get rid of the disease. Aren’t the Damascus rivers cleaner by far than the rivers in Israel? Why not bathe there; at least I’ll get clean.” He stomped off in a rage.
[Here’s another example of someone believing he could only be healed in a certain way. In this case, he vociferously resisted the new (and simpler) approach given by Elisha.]
Naaman’s servants tried to change his mind. “If the prophet had asked you to do something hard and heroic, wouldn’t you have done it? So why not this simple ‘wash and be clean’?”
Naaman gave in, followed Elisha’s orders—and was completely healed. AND he was convinced that the only true God was Elisha’s God, the LORD.
Photo by Mohamed Nohassi on Unsplash
These stories remind me of the people I’ve tried to share The Healing Codes with. They are resistant to such a strange way of healing. If you don’t understand that everything is energy, and that if you shift the energy from negative to positive, things can change, things can be healed—you won’t be open to The Healing Codes.
Or a number of other healing modalities, for that matter. I don’t believe The Healing Codes are God’s only tool in his toolbox. He can use any tool he wants.
The question, for all of us, is: Are we open to God using a tool that we’ve never heard of, or don’t understand?
Can we, like the man at the pool of Bethesda, or like Naaman, take the step of faith and follow what God may be showing us to do—even if we don’t understand it or if it seems too “simple”?
What “miracle” might be possible if we did step out in faith?
[Note: you might want to share this link with someone who is skeptical about The Healing Codes or whatever else you know will help them, that he or she has resisted.)
I believe God has given me some new tools, besides The Healing Codes, that have worked to not only heal, but transform my own life and that of others. If you are interested in exploring what more God might have for you, please visit my web page and fill out a Clarity Questionnaire for the Align with Your Divine Design program. No obligation.
Hidden Stressors-Part Three
Posted by: | CommentsIn Part Two in this series on Hidden Stressors, I talked about trauma.
How there are no “little t” traumas. Traumas have to do with how the nervous system responded to an event that was overwhelming at the time. Some people, especially highly sensitive people, may have more finely-tuned nervous systems that take in more information—hence, may be more susceptible to trauma.
I just finished watching hours of the Trauma Superconference 3 that aired the replays recently. It made me realize that a lot of us are carrying around unhealed, even unknown trauma in our nervous systems.
These traumas may be triggered by the recent (and current) collective trauma of the COVID-19 pandemic.
Especially the trauma of unmet needs. Read More→
