Healing “The Story of Your Life”


The other day, a client moaned to me, “That’s the story of my life.”

“Then that’s exactly what we need to address for healing,” I responded.

What’s “the story of your life”? That “heart matter” that keeps on popping up for you?

Here are some of the ones I commonly hear:

  • “No matter what I do, I can never quite get ahead.”
  • “People don’t pay attention to me. It’s like I’m invisible.”
  • “Never enough (money, time, love, joy, support….)”
  • “I’m never _____ enough (good/smart/attractive/etc.)”
  • “I never feel really loved for who I am.”
  • “I’m always getting blamed for things.”
  • “People always end up abusing/leaving/betraying me.”

Such negative patterns can usually be traced to unconscious beliefs based on interpretations of certain events in your life. But not only your own life–sometimes these patterns have their roots in “the way things have been” for generations.

The beliefs formed in our very early days or “absorbed” generationally get “hard-wired” in the unconscious and are difficult to access. This is where that “story of your life” becomes so valuable. Those themes that keep recurring are clues to what can lead to breakthroughs when they’re healed.

And the good news is–you can change these things!

You can rewrite the story of your life. Starting right now, you can create a new story.

The first step is to recognize the pattern. Articulate the story.

The Story of My Life

The “story of my life” can be summarized in one word: overwhelm.

As a Highly Sensitive Person, one of my traits is that I’m easily overstimulated. I was born this way. It didn’t help that the first 6 weeks or so of my life were spent in the NICU as a very sick baby. (I’m actually written up somewhere in a medical journal as being a “miracle baby.”) Back in those days, the NICU was an extremely stimulating place–with little to no normal human contact such as being held or cuddled.

One woman, who worked as a nurse in a NICU unit around the same year when I was there, looked back on those years and told me this: “The babies belonged to us [nurses]. The parents had nothing to do with their care. We lined them up in an assembly line and propped the bottle to feed them.”

When I heard this (just a few years ago), I realized why my mother and I never properly bonded. It was not her fault, nor mine. We never had the chance.

While I don’t have a conscious memory of that time, I do have either an imagined memory or spirit memory (I believe the human spirit records everything that happens to us), and it was of overwehelming noise and bright lights, never being able to rest, and loneliness. A fight for my life, and a sense that I would not survive if I didn’t please everyone.

These themes I have had to return to with The Healing Codes again and again.

Clues that you’re dealing with an unhealed memory

come up in the form of an irrational reaction to


For instance, one day my husband made a minor mistake.

Instead of taking it in stride, I freaked out.

Realizing my reaction was way out of proportion to the actual thing my husband did, I prayed about what the real issue was.

Strangely, I got this “memory” of being in that NICU. A supervisor was scolding a nurse, presumably my nurse, saying, “You can’t make a mistake in here. You could have killed that baby!” (“That baby” being me, of course.)

I can still “remember” it. How? I don’t know. A spirit memory, I guess. (I believe  sometimes spirit memories are accessible to the conscious mind.)

No wonder I was freaked out at someone making a mistake! To me, it was a matter of life and death, based on that memory.

(Another memory I’ve had to heal is my first-grade teacher making us take the erasers off our pencils because “it encouraged us to make mistakes.” One night when doing my homework, I made a mistake on the paper, realized it, and erased it as best I could. That teacher noticed I had used an eraser and marked it wrong, even though it was correct. Message: you can’t ever correct a mistake once it’s made.)

Can you see why I became a perfectionist, terrified of making a mistake–or of someone else making a mistake that could affect me?

Heal the Story of Your Life and Experience a Breakthrough!

Many times when we heal this “story of my life” theme, we experience a breakthrough.

I knew I was healed of my “mistake issue” when my husband made a mistake some time after, and I took it in stride. Our marriage got a lot better as I was less anxious and therefore less critical of him making mistakes.

The bigger issue that was healed was my relationship with my mother. We got very close after she and I had both healed in many ways, including that lack of early bonding.

Who knows what breakthroughs you may experience when you heal “the story of your life”?

And if you would like some personalized help with identifying those “heart matters,” just go to my Healing Codes Coaching website to find out how I can help you.





0 0 votes
Article Rating
Notify of

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Oldest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

Thank you, Diane, for sharing this powerful story. I can relate to many aspects of it: For example, a lifelong subconscious fear of making a mistake. It repeatedly stops me from developing my creative ideas – book ideas, business ideas, creative hobbies (sewing, painting, singing). I start each one with lots of fun inspiring insights flooding my heart and mind, take lots of notes, and when it comes to actually “doing it” I stop. The early memory that often pops to mind when I feel like that is from around 2nd or 3rd grade: I remember I was a good… Read more »

Privacy Policy

View Privacy Policy. Your use of this site implies you agree with this policy.