When the Holidays Bring Painful Memories


For some of us, the holidays are anything but peaceful or joyful.

Perhaps the holidays bring up memories of disappointment, tension, even trauma.

Or, perhaps there’s more of a sense of emptiness. It’s not that anything bad happened, it’s just that . . .  there was nothing especially joyful about it either.

Or maybe it’s just that things are so different now, with all that’s going on and all that’s changed in the world.

If any of these scenarios fit you, I encourage you to do a Healing Code specifically on your negative holiday memories.

First, start with your current feelings and beliefs about the holidays. Is the belief that it’s all up to you to make the holidays a perfect, special time causing you stress? Are you feeling anxiety over finding “the perfect gift”? Are you dealing with the old “not enough” feeling as you try to make your budget stretch to include gifts? Are you anticipating disappointment because you’ve always felt disappointed by Christmas? Are you feeling pressured to plan a great party, wondering if you can live up to others’ expectations? Are you feeling lonely because you can’t be with loved ones now, and that’s triggering unhealed loneliness from the past?

Whatever your current stress is, rate it (1-10, 10 being the worst). Then ask yourself, “What other times have I felt this way?” Jot down those memories, rate them, then start to work on the strongest or earliest memory with a Healing Code. (Use the universal Code from The Healing Code book, or get a custom Healing Code from me.)

You can drain the negative charge from those earlier memories so that they don’t have to color your current experience. You can enjoy this year for what it is, and create new, joyful memories.

I pray you will let the Joy-giver, whose birthday Christmas celebrates, heal any negative memories, and break into your life with the joy and peace he came to bring.

And if you want some extra help and support, check out my coaching at

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I am a former Christmas outcast. Although on the outside, nothing has changed: I am “alone” in my tiny snow-covered house in the mountains rejoicing in thankfulness over the beauty around me. But I can assure you, I am not alone at all.   Let me go back a long time and share something beautiful with you, although at the time it was more painful than I can say.   Some years ago I was on the run from a very dangerous person who had held me essentially as a sex slave at gunpoint for 9.5 years.   Someone very… Read more »

Ida Munson

Thanks Diane for such a thoughtful understanding of what Christmas 'stress' is to some people. I'm sure I'm not alone, when I am pleased when it is over – the overwhelming materialistic atmosphere, people rushing about (if they are not in traffic queues). No time for quiet contemplation or meditation for some.  Commercialisation  seems to have buried the true meaning of Christmas for many people.


Thanks for thinking of us Christmas'  "outcasts" and for all the help you are giving us. God bless you wishing you the warmest Holy-days.

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